What a fabulous night of soccer at BBVA Compass Stadium. A 4-0 thumping of a 10-man D.C. United, Boniek Garcia scored his first goal, Will "Dancing Bear" Bruin got back on the score sheet and Brian Ching scored a Pirlo-esque penalty. No doubt everyone in attendance had a great time.
As for those us forced to take in the match on television, it was slightly less enjoyable. I'd need to go back through the records, but it at least feels like the Dynamo are featured on Galavision more than any other team...which really sucks. Why? Because Galavision sucks. It's a terrible network with incredibly low production value and the feed quality of a mid-1980's cable access show.
Presumably, as part of the agreement between the league and Galavision, they have have exclusive broadcast rights for the matches at a national level. Thus, MLS Live blacks out matches shown on the channel. Fine fine, I understand how this stuff works, but I have one major issue with this. Galavision is not a national channel. Plenty of viewers across the country don't get the channel and many of us that are lucky enough to, get a horrible SD feed on which you can't identify players, even by the numbers on their jerseys because it's so damn blurry.
Add to that the play-by-play is in Spanish. Look, I'm all for exposing the league to as broad an audience as possible. I'm all for Spanish language broadcast, but the predominant audience for MLS is English speakers. Watching matches in a language you don't understand is tough and often not enjoyable.
So, I muted by TV and allowed my iPod to create a soundtrack for the match. Basically, I hit shuffle and waited to see what happened. There might of been some adjustments and skips, but that's ok. I found the experience to be much more entertaining and it will probably be something I do on a more regular basis in the future.
Rather than some kind of tactical review of the match, I decided to recap the soundtrack and offer some thoughts about the songs and some observations from the match.
Pre-Game: Blind Faith - "Do What You Like
A fitting opener that both set a good tone for the smooth play we would enjoy and at 15:33, it filled up the time before kick-off very well.
First Half Kick-off: The Beatles - "Get Back"
The Dynamo had been struggling offensively the last few matches. A switch to the 4-3-3 played a big part of that, along with integrating Boniek Garcia in to the team. Geoff Cameron's return, the 10-man advantage and the need to get this important home stand off to a good start all worked well with this tune. The Dynamo needed to get back to basics and they did just that.
Metallica - "Don't Tread on Me"
Good attitude song. This is our house! Nobody comes in to BBVA Compass Stadium and pushes us around! Unfortunately, United was to a great extent doing just that early in the match.
Guster - "Medicine"
Little did D.C. United know at this point they were about to take their medicine. In fact, for the first 18 minutes of so, they dominated the game. It wasn't a great start for the Dynamo, but everything would change a few minutes later.
Foo Fighters - "'I Should Have Known"
There was some frustration building at this point, United was playing well and the doubts about whether or not the Dynamo were going to get things going were beginning to form in the mind. We should have known things would work out alright though.
The Dead Weather - "New Pony"
"How much, how much? How much longer?" We were all wondering just that, how much longer before this team gets things going offensively. Macoumba Kandji's break away combined with Bill Hamid's poor decision to make a late, hopeless slide tackle answered the question. Brad Davis stepped up to the spot and beat Joe Willis to put the Dynamo up 1-0.
The Shins - "Girl on a Wing", Medeski Martin & Wood - "Flat Tires", The Black Keys - "Little Black Submarines"
Wu-Tang Clan - "Bring Da Ruckus"
After the red card and penalty, United settled and looked competitive. In fact, there was every reason to believe if they could stay compact and keep pressing when the opportunity presented itself, they might be able to steal a point. The Dynamo hadn't really grabbed hold of the match yet, despite being a man up. Time to bring da ruckus.
Lovin' Spoonful - 'Summer in the City"
Hot town, summer in the city. It's always hot in Houston and it was time to really put the heat on United. Luiz Camargo fought off a defender near the end line and crossed the ball back across the face of goal to a wide open Will Bruin who easily beat Willis who'd moved too far towards his post. Hot town and a 2-0 lead.
Nirvana - "Something in the Way"
With the 2 goal lead, the Dynamo began to take over the game with a patient, building attack that helped to further demoralize United.
Radiohead - "Four Minute Warning"
As the half drew to a close, United players were no doubt thinking...This is just a nightmare, soon I'm gonna wake up, someones gonna bring me round.
2nd Half Kick-Off: Supertramp - "Take the Long Way Home"
Down two goals, down a man, humidity in the air, who could blame United if they felt like their life had become a catastrophe?
Red Hot Chili Peppers - "Mellowship Slinky in B Major", Rolling Stones - "Honky Tonk Woman", Smashing Pumpkins - "1979"
Gary Clark Jr. - "Bright Lights"
You gonna know my name by the end of the night “well”. Bright lights, big city going to my head. Boniek Garcia's arrival is complete. Andre Hainault's cross found a rising Boniek at the far post who sent a header back across goal, inside the post. Everyone is gonna know his name now.
Daft Punk - "Da Funk / Daftendirekt"
Up 3-0, it was time to just keep the pressure on and keep the clean sheet.
Toadies - "Happyface"
Boniek was smiling, the fans were smiling, lots of happy faces. (Yes I know this song has nothing to do with being happy)
Queen - 'Want to Break Free"
The Dynamo offense wanted to break free tonight and it finally did. Simple as that.
Queens of the Stone Age - "Feel Good Hit of the Summer"
The Astros are terrible, Jeremy Lin isn't really that exciting. Let's face it, in Houston the Dynamo are the feel good hit of the summer.
Alabama Shakes - "Hold On", AC/DC - "Hells Bells"
In the final minutes all the Dynamo had to do was hold on and kill the game. Calen Carr had other ideas, earning a penalty that Brian Ching scored with a Pirlo-esque cheekiness. 4-0 Dynamo, done and dusted. You could hear them ringing all over the stadium, Hell's Bells tolling for United on this evening.
Thank you for listening to Dynamo Theory Radio. Until next time, this is the Ginge signing off.