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"US SOCCER PROMOTION-RELEGATION NOW" says Airplane

The only thing of note that happened on Sunday was in the sky. And I don't mean Ishizaki's shot.

By Justin Jerkins
Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

The Los Angeles Galaxy won the MLS Cup on Sunday. But that's not important. What is important is that during the first half, there was an airplane that flew over the StubHub Center and trailing behind it was a banner that read:

US SOCCER PROMOTION-RELEGATION NOW

No one is quite sure who the culprit might be but if you've been around the US soccer blogosphere for a while, you may have your suspicions. The fight waged by a very vocal subset of the US Soccer fan community has flared recently due to the publicity of its most aggressive figurehead, Ted Westervelt. Whatever your feelings on the structure of the league and the feasibility of a promotion/relegation system, the overhead banner Sunday afternoon made for a pretty hearty chuckle.

As the game went on, the realization slowly sank in that money was exchanged for the service of an airplane banner that meant to ruffle Don Garber's feathers. Back in June of 2013, the Reddit community raised the required $605 to fly an anti-Vergara banner over a mid-season match at the StubHub Center. With that in mind, how much might it be to fly one over the MLS Cup Final?

There's not a lot of price rates available online and it does vary depending on location and event so I would assume it is safe to say that a high-visibility banner such as that might run at least double. There is an individual that likely paid over $1000 to fly a promotion-relegation banner over the MLS Cup Final. Let that sink in.

So what else can you get for $1000 in Los Angeles? Here's a some things that money could have been spent on instead:

1. Four hundred twenty-five and a half In-N-Out Cheeseburgers
At $2.35 per burger, you'd have enough to feed every 2014 Chivas USA season ticket holder 212 cheeseburgers.

2. An Uber to Las Vegas
An Uber to Las Vegas costs about $700. Once you get there, that leaves you $300 to bet on '00' at roulette because you probably have better odds at hitting that than the New England Revolution winning the MLS Cup (looking at you, Jay Heaps).

3. A one-way flight to England so you can live out your Pro/Rel fantasy
For $880, you could book a one-way flight from LAX to England on May 24th, 2015 so you can make the final day of the Premier League season. In fact, with the leftover money, you could grab a ticket to Sunderland v. Leicester City so you can really get a feel for the impending depression of a team whose season ended in December and have not had a chance to do anything of note. Also Leicester City will probably be getting relegated so that should be fun!

4. An Uber to LAX, a one-way to Houston, and 247 Whataburgers with cheese
Actually, maybe after the $95 Uber ride to LAX, you could hop on a $200 one-way flight to Houston, and get 247 Whataburgers with cheese - clearly the better value than the In-N-Out cheeseburgers.

5. Envelopes
With the 2014 player allocations, dispersal drafts, and general postage, I'm concerned that Don Garber might be running out of envelopes. At twenty cents (what a bargain!), we could get the Commish 5000 envelopes which should last until the January transfer window.

Any of these things would be more reasonable than flying an airplane banner demanding a promotion-relegation structure (in a single-entity league, mind you) over anything.

What else would you rather spend the $1000 on? A new fedora for Don Garber? Bribe Mark Geiger to not referee? Sound off in the comments below.

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